Considering I'm scared of my own shadow half the time, I'm actually pretty daring when it comes to adrenaline-surging activities, and last week I ticked another off my 'wild side' wishlist: Go Ape.

Based in Rivington, a forest walk not too far from me, the Go Ape treetop course is something I'd seen many times before. Let me tell you now, it's a lot less scary from the ground! Naively I had imagined that I would be just walking around the course, firmly attached to an overhead cable at all times, and with an instructor by my side. Boy, was I in for a surprise.

Our instructor, Luke, had us all read safety sheets and sign to confirm we understood them, then got us all kitted up and explained that we had a pulley and two carabiners on our harnesses. He then dropped the news that we were in charge of ensuring that we swapped these over one by one at each point, thus staying attached at all times. No instructor would be doing it for us, we would be (quite literally) flying solo! Luckily we were given a test run on terra firma, then a very small, low course, and tested on our knowledge so we were quickly confident and raring to go. 

Fear kicked in as soon as I set foot on the first ladder, but as I clambered onto the platform and swapped my carabiners securely over, I was hit with a wave of relief and the realisation that I had done it. That very much set the tone for the whole course. The more fear I felt, the more pride I experienced when I didn't faint, vom, or fall, and believe me, there were some very testing moments.

I warned you that I was naive, so it hadn't occurred to me that my body would be tested along with my mind, but I soon learned my lesson as I wrestled with a swinging net, swearing along the way. The nets, along with swinging steps which had me dangerously close to doing the splits, were the only part of the course I genuinely disliked. They even left me questioning whether I would go again. I have the upper body strength of a wet paper towel, so the nets in particular were super tough and I did feel the strain the next day, but looking back I'm still glad I did them. It reminded me to be grateful for my mobility, really pushed (and pulled) me, and rewarded me with the best part: zipping over the water. 

The reservoir at Rivington runs along the forest, so I've seen it plenty of times, but during Go Ape I got a completely different view as I flew right over. Oddly enough, I wasn't scared at all, I felt totally free and exhilarated as the wind blew through my hair and the water sparkled below. It was breathtaking. The course had four more zipwires, one at the end of each segment, and while they were all equally fun, zooming out in the open was the clear winner for me.

As an anxious person, I very often feel that things are dangerous or even impossible, that I need someone to look after me, and that I'm just not capable, but for 2 hours every one of those worries was proven wrong. My boyfriend cheered me on and the instructors reassured us that they'd be there for emergencies, but it was up to me, myself and I to climb, jump, swing, and wobble my way around, and I did! Yes, some parts were hard, but if the worst things to come from dangling on a rope for 2 hours were a few bruises and a very muddy bum, maybe the little things I fear aren't so dangerous after all. 

Would you give Go Ape a go? 

This post was NOT sponsored, but I did visit in exchange for posting content on my Instagram. I just loved it so much that I'm chatting about it here too.

Oh anxiety, you little sod. Not only is it enough for you to permanently sit on my shoulder and tell me I look like an experiment, have the IQ of a doormat, and my family are in permanent danger, you just have to shout over anything that says differently, don't you? 

Recently I had an interview where the manager shook my hand and enthusiastically said she was pleased to meet me. I stumbled over some questions, but answered them all articulately, maintained eye contact, and even made the interviewers laugh with a few ice breaking jokes. They thanked me for my time and I left with a smile, not realising that anxiety was lurking around the corner. 

The minute I stepped outside it was like I had a bully walking beside me, shouting every insult they could think of. Anxiety told how stupid I sounded, how I'd sipped my water the wrong way, how they were laughing at me, not with me. For the rest of the day I couldn't even sit still because the thoughts were so intrusive and I was filled with overwhelming nervous energy. I tossed and turned that night, going over the same nasty thoughts.

My anxiety was heightened from that situation because I was really under pressure to perform and get the job (I didn't, FYI), but even in fun situations like meeting my friends or just going for a day out, I'm always reminded that I can't escape it. It waits until I'm alone then bombards me with a barrage of abuse, telling me how ugly, stupid, and unlikable I really am, pointing out every mistake or awkward moment.

Clearly, the answer here is to work on building my confidence and destroying my anxiety (much easier said than done) but I know that there will be some of you out there who understand exactly what I mean and feel even more dissuaded from doing new things because you know post event anxiety will hit, so I wanted to share some advice on what we can do to tackle it from now on. 

Jump back in

After a bad experience, it's natural to be wary, but anxiety makes it into a bad experience because it wants you to itself. Apply for another job or suggest meeting your friends again next month before those nasty thoughts can creep in and put you off.

Prove it wrong

Anxiety will pick up on the tiniest things, so beat it at its own game and write down everything you enjoyed or did well as soon as you can. It might feel boastful writing 'X said I'm hilarious and would love to see me again', but if X really said that and you can see a reminder, it's a point against anxiety.

Have a distraction or reward

As I said, anxiety gets me when I'm alone and still, so for me it works best if I can distract myself with a craft project, walk, or even cleaning my room. You might prefer rewarding yourself with a bath or a bar of your favourite chocolate to look forward to after the event so you don't go from a high to a low.

Have you experienced PEA before? How do you deal with it?

When I was younger I dreamed of driving my own car. My dad, the safest driver I know, taught me how, and I passed both theory and practical tests first time with flying colours. You would think I'd be full of confidence, but a huge gap between passing and getting back into a car depleted all my self-assurance. 

Rather than feeling thrilled to hold my car keys, I would have panic attacks. I dreaded even the smallest journeys, and I still get palpitations when I parallel park, and bad nerves on new routes. Things are slowly getting better, and I wanted to share my tips to help people in the same situation.

Please bear in mind that this is solely my advice for feeling comfortable in the car, and I would always recommend taking more tuition from a teacher if you doubt your driving ability. Stay safe, and always follow The Highway Code and road laws.

I know, it can seem impossible at times, and it is a fact that driving your car will always carry risks, but the only way to boost your abilities and confidence is to keep practising them. Make sure you have the number for your breakdown cover, some breakdown essentials, and a map if you need it, to put those 'what ifs' to rest, then get out there. You can start small and drive a little longer each time, every journey helps.

So you drove out a little too soon and they beeped at you? You're okay. You braked too suddenly and the car behind stopped close behind you? They're okay. Yes, these are mistakes and you don't want to repeat them, but try to see them as a lesson rather than letting your whole drive be ruined. The most important thing is that nobody was hurt, and you can learn from the blips to have an even better drive next time.

It goes without saying that you should never obstruct your vision whilst driving, but I have found that popping on a pair of sunnies really helps me in the driving seat, as I feel like other drivers cannot see me and judge me on my image (for example, assuming that I will drive poorly because I am a young woman). They also mean I'm never squinting and can see the road clearer, so I feel more assured.

Film star
Most of my anxiety actually comes from fears about other drivers and their behaviour, so my parents kindly got me a dash cam for Christmas to ease my mind. It deters bad drivers as they know you'll have footage, and if something should happen you have proof for your insurers. Using mine on the motorway on my recent trip to The Lakes really did help.

How do you ease your driving anxiety?

When I started this blog I swore I wouldn't talk about anxiety. I want to use it to look back at happy times, but the harsh reality is that they are often clouded with my doubts and fears. There are a few things that I've found to keep anxiety at bay, and if sharing them helps just one person, it's worth breaking my own ban.

Singing

I hear my anxiety very clearly, and the only way to shut The Voice up is to make another noise. Sometimes I'll click, whistle, or hum, but I love singing most as I can concentrate on the beat and lyrics for total distraction. If you don't like singing, try listening to uplifting songs and focus on hearing just one instrument at a time, or tapping out a beat. 

The outdoors

Nature is an absolute tonic for my broken little brain, as it gives me perspective. When I walk through a woodland full of trees a hundred times older than me, or listen to waves lapping on a shore, they seem much more real and powerful than any of my problems. The space also helps, it's as though anxiety can't catch me when I'm not trapped in four walls. 

Arts and crafts

Having a vivid imagination is a blessing and a curse. It works hand in hand with my anxiety, so if I tear it away and put it to good use illustrating or painting, it reduces anxiety's power hugely. It also distracts me for some time while I'm concentrating on the designs, and it's rewarding to grow my skills and have something physical at the end of it.

Stretching
Just five minutes of flinging my arms around with my iPod full blast really revitalises me. I know lots of people swear by yoga and I suppose this is my miniature version! It's nothing too fancy, I just try to lift and lengthen all my limbs as far as I can and it reduces all the crunchy tension in my bod.

Have you tried these techniques?